Tuxedoes
by HecateA
Summary: Why must the Kane Chronicles' most epic nine year old like penguins?  Dogs, hockey, video games, baseball- nope, penguins.  How did that happen?  How has it affected his life?  How?  -Oneshot.


**Due to the fact that I love Felix like a second little brother (although I love the one I'm currently stuck with as well- honnestly, I do), I've daydreamed a lot about him during moments that are not reserved for daydreaming and this came out as my first Kane Chronicles fanfiction. I was also thinking about what kind of a family lets their 9 year old kid go learn magic in Brooklyn, and POOF, came the family. I also thought about what I'd feel like if my little brother went to Brooklyn to learn magic and... Well, it's been lying in Microsoft Word for a while, so it comes out into the light now and hopefully doesn't burn. **

**Anyways, Felix, props to you for the small-child represent in Brooklyn, and for your love of penguins. **

**Disclaimer: Supposedly some guy in Texas owns the Kane Chronicles, so I guess it isn't me. It's been a rough day.**

* * *

><p>George and Tina had decided to take their sons traveling.<p>

They hadn't been sure where to go. If Disney got any more tourists it'd explode, Canada had some beautiful scenery in the Maritime or Rockies but it was right across the border, everyone went to Hawaii, Australia had some huge jetlag issues that they didn't want to deal with…

Finally someone close had gone to Africa for work, so there stood their little family; on the shores of a South African beach. It was chilly out, and they stood just back of a flock of African Penguins; also known as the 'Jackass' Penguin.

Felix was cowering behind Tina's legs.

"I don't wanna go to Antarctica!" He said.

"We're not in Antarctica, sport, we're in South Africa. These penguins live here too!"

"I don't like penguins." Felix said.

"What? Why not?" Tina asked.

"They're wearing tuxedos." Felix said. "It means they work."

"Aww, Felix, no… That's not…" Tina was stuck in a moment of 'oh my gosh this kid is so cute'.

"It's not a tuxedo!" Max yelled at Felix. "They're penguins, that's how they look like dummy!"

"Max, be nice, he's younger than you. And Felix hon, it's just how they look." Tina said.

"Still don't like them." He said stubbornly.

"But they're friendly little critters!" George said, lowering the camera for once. "Not like the other people who wear tuxedos."

"Stop looking at it all through a lens, George, you're missing some astonishing scenery and beauty!" Tina scolded.

"Felix will barely remember this when he's older, and I want him to always remember this-"

"Max! Get away from the penguins!" Tina called, suddenly noticing the whereabouts of her older son (aka: the middle of the penguin mob).

"Mom they like me!"

"Max!" George called. "They're wild animals!"

"But Dad- they'll even let me touch them!" Max extended his hand and the penguin bit at it and then slapped him with its wing.

"AH!" Max, unhurt but plenty shocked, said running back to join Felix behind Tina's legs.

Felix let out a giggle and came out from behind his mother's legs. He watched the penguins and how they bobbed when they waddled and started doing the same.

Felix was going to remember this trip crystal clear when he was older…

* * *

><p>"Merry Christmas Felix, this is from Mommy and Daddy." Tina said handing Felix a mushy green package. Felix smiled and ripped the wrapping paper off.<p>

"A penguin!" He gasped. He took off the remaining paper and gave the penguin a hug.

"Wow! A real penguin!"

"It's not real, dummy." His brother called.

"Max." Tina warned.

"Is it a boy or a girl?" Felix asked.

"It's a stuffed animal- you pick!"

"Max, that's enough," George said before turning back to his youngest son. "It's a boy."

"I'm going to call him Peter!" Felix decided.

"Peter? Peter the Penguin?"

"Max, Felix can call his penguin Peter if he wants." Tina said, "We didn't say anything when you named the cat 'Kitty'."

"I was 5!"

"He's 4. Oh look, here's a present for Dad!" Tina said, changing topics by digging under the Christmas tree.

* * *

><p>The cake was Felix's favourite- chocolate! With chocolate icing, chocolate chips and warm, gooey chocolate sauce dripped on top; and a scoop of vanilla ice cream cold enough for, well, a penguin, on the side. Peter was perched right next to Felix's plastic cup of juice.<p>

"Here you go, my big boy." Grandma said, handing him a big box with a red ribbon. Grandma's presents were always in big boxes, always. It was a rule about being a grandmother.

"Thank you." Felix said, because his mom liked when he said that. He ripped off the Spiderman wrapping paper, opened the box and saw…

"Penguins!" He said.

"Again?" Max asked.

"Yeah- 5 penguins!" He awed. He took them out.

"Wow!" Grandma chuckled. "I thought you'd like it."

"It's super cool!" Felix said. He found the biggest one.

"That's Papa Penguin," he took out the second largest one, "This is Mama Penguin," he found the next in line, "That's Grandma Penguin, and this is Brother Penguin, and this is Baby Penguin!"

"That's an even worst name then Peter!" Max said.

"Max, common, it's _his_ present." George said.

Felix picked up the box after throwing in Peter.

"I'm going to go show them where they live!" He said.

"Felix, aren't you going to finish your cake?" Tina called after him.

"Later!" He said running down the hall and nearly killing himself tripping over his foot. Grandma chuckled.

"Oh, he's adorable…"

* * *

><p>Tina peeked into eight year old Felix's room.<p>

The Snowball family was lined up around his pillow. Dr Snow, Icy, Skipper, Tuxedo, Larry-Paul-John and his girlfriend Sue-Mary-Beth (they were linked by the wing), Icecap, Polar, Page, Benjamin, Stead, Glitter, Snow Angel, Sk8er Boi, Wings, Fly, Winter, and Puck were lined against the wall. He was clutching Peter though. It was always Peter.

Since the Snowball family, people were giving Felix penguins whenever a present was due. The only penguin he'd bought over the last 3 years was Tuxedo, and that was with Tooth Fairy money. Sometimes, people even warned him about personalities. Like the mad genius, Dr Snow, Glitter the diva…

Felix was too cute with these penguins. Beating the odds everybody had given, he remembered each penguin by name. The other day he'd asked them if they could move to Antarctica. And the day before that he'd asked her where Egypt was on a world map. A little more confusing for Tina, and a little scary too. Her grandmother was Egyptian- but that was probably just a coincidence, right? Without a doubt. How could Felix know? Why would Felix care? He was too busy with his penguins for those musty Egyptian stories Grandmother had told. Hopefully.

* * *

><p>Felix stood, shivering on the roof, in front of a girl with blue hair in pyjamas. Her pyjamas looked warm even in the dark.<p>

"He ate my penguin." Felix told her.

"Sorry- come again?" The girl with the blue hair said.

"I was running, and he took my penguin, and ate it."

"Your penguin?"

"My penguin." The kid nodded.

Sadie was trying to figure out if this was mythological manner or animal rights violation when she turned around.

"Carter!" She yelled. "Carter! Carter!"

"What?" A guy said coming up on the roof. Sadie couldn't see him clearly (which may or may not be a bad thing) but she knew it was the one and only Carter Kane.

"Can you get my penguin back?" the kid asked. "You're magic right? Like the tape said?"

"You got the tapes? How old are you?" Carter asked.

"Who cares- let's get him inside before he freezes! Did they eat your coat too? Who's 'they' exactly?"

"What happened to 'not caring'?" Carter said.

"Right! Come here little man."

"Felix."

"Then come here Felix."

She took Felix by the hand very gently -they were as cold as if the boy was an ice statue- and brought him inside the mansion. They were in a corridor where 4 people were already gathered.

"How did the kid get on the roof?" A girl holding scrolls in her arms said. "Is it just the blood of the pharaohs in him?" Clio asked again.

"Probably. Felix, meet Clio, Alyssa, Jaz, and Walt. Guys, this is Felix. He said he found the tapes too."

"They have lockers at your school, kid?" Alyssa asked Felix. He shook his head.

"I went to my brother's school."

"Oh, okay."

"Penguins!" Felix suddenly said. He was looking at Jaz' pyjamas. Little penguins and snowflakes dancing around the fuzzy blue.

"Umm… Yeah…" Jaz said. "Do you like penguins Felix?"

"The cat-snake ate mine."

"Oh, that's horrible." Jaz sympathised.

"Common Felix, sounds like you've had a long day. How about we get you to call your parents so they know you're okay, then you get some sleep in a room. We'll figure everything out tomorrow when everyone's okay." Sadie said. Felix nodded and followed Sadie down the corridor.

* * *

><p>"So you can make things appear?" Felix asked.<p>

"Yes. When you think about it really hard." Sadie told him. "But it's hard, and it might take you a while to master it."

Felix closed his eyes instantly.

"Penguins! Penguins! Penguins!"

"Felix, you don't yell it out loud it won't- oh my god!"

Felix opened his eyes and Felix saw three penguins running around Sadie as panicked as headless chicken. And one of them was holding another in his mouth, and Felix somehow knew it was Peter.

He smiled.

This was possibly the best day of his life.

* * *

><p>"What's that room?" Sasha asked. Max was just giving her a tour of the house before Mom called down for supper. They'd acted surprisingly good around Sasha considering she was the first girlfriend he'd introduced to them. So far no baby stories, no stalkerish questions…<p>

"Oh- umm… My little brother's." Max said.

"You have a baby brother?" Sasha asked. She pushed a strand of blond hair from her face and it fell back almost immediately. She put it back behind her ear- which she could go the whole day doing (and usually did).

"Yeah…" Max's throat got full. "He… He doesn't live here anymore, he's at a school."

He pushed the door open and flicked on the light. It stuttered on and off for a bit –nobody had gone into Felix's room for a while- and then opened up. It was your basic 8-year-old-kid room, plus a pile of penguins on the bed.

"Penguins?" Sasha smiled.

"Yeah," Max said. He hadn't seen Felix in a while and dear gods the kid was annoying, but it sort of weighed down on Max after a bit. Common, there's always that one day a week where you could really use a kid charging at you yelling 'I found out what penguins eat!' and giving you the Latin names. Max was suddenly realising that.

"Tuxedos…"


End file.
